The title of my blog is "Controlled Chaos". I accept the fact that chaos is a part of life, but that doesn't mean that I can easily give up my need to control what I can. That leads me to today. I'm 39 weeks pregnant and my little man, though I am extremely ready for him to come, apparently is not ready to meet us yet.
Oh, I've tried all the tricks to bring on labor--walking, spicy foods, fresh pineapple, exercise, bouncing on the trampoline, and a few other highly recommended "remedies" I won't mention--and yet, no baby. I'm having to basically accept the fact that I cannot control the arrival date of my little guy. I. am. not. in. control. here. There, I said it.
So instead of fretting over the fact that he isn't coming on my timeline, I suppose I will just sit back and enjoy the time I have left being pregnant, because this is absolutely the last time I will ever be. This is the last time I will feel this life move inside of me. The last time I will share these intimate moments with my baby, without having to share him with others. Precious and special moments preparing me for the time when I can meet this little soul face to face, though he and I already know each other so well.
"There are some things I can't control, and that's just the way it is". - Susane Colasanti, Waiting For You
Sigh. Ain't that the truth.
